Everyday it's the same story, I'm acting like this again and again, but nothing seems to change much.
I had been emotional and mentally weak ever since the day I realized.
What did I realized?
Anyway this blog entry is all the things I wanted to say but couldn't 'cause I can't express them in speech.
As soon as I thought of something and wanted to type this out, I then realized that I don't even know what I'm trying to say.
Ok here goes.
Why should I do this?
Why would I want this?
Is it worth it?
I holded my tears, I try to hold back. Nothing actually works.
Yes, I'm jealous. It might be not what I think it is, but yes, I will still. Whenever I saw it.... A strange rage was built inside of me.
I tried to seal it, I tried.
If I don't........ I'm sure, I will be crushed.
But when I went back home, I was too tired to let out my emotions, so I kept it.
Why am I pushing myself? I don't know.
I want to shout, I want to run, I want to cry, but I couldn't. It's such a horrible feeling, but I'm trying hard to cope with it.
I guess I'm still young. lol
I never expected that I will be so poisoned.
Yes, I might be...
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You don't have to understand what I'm saying here, I'm just trying to express my feelings, in a unusual way.
Bye.
Bye.
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